What is a successful life?

[dragslaye]

Dear Reader:

Allow me first to all to clarify that I am not by any means intending to tell you what you should consider as a successful life, instead I am giving my humble opinion about his matte. Now my opinion is only as important as you wanted to be, as for this topic I will like, that if you have the time, to express your own definition of a successful life.

So lest begin by segregating that which is not important for a successful life. A successful life is not about how much money you posses, how many action or bond you own, it is neither about how many houses you have. Life is not about how many PHD, masters, mayors minors, bachelors, diplomas, certifications or any other form of education you have achieved. Even less, life is not about how many trophies, awards or pictures you are able to show off

But then you might ask, what does it make life successful then? well my dear friend that would be easiest question I had never being ask ( not seriously i have never being ask that question). What makes a life truly successful is the people who are around you at the time you receive that award, is the people who help you while you were having troubles studying for that subject. The people who lives with you or who come to visit you. Those who cheer you up while you are feeling down, those who give you courage when you are afraid

It is not about us, but they, who have share their happiness and their sadness, they who have bing with us in our bad times and in our good times. It is the memories we share, it is the feelings we share that can make a life really successful

[PeSla]

Perhaps we should ask, of ourselves at least, what is an authentic life.

Worries of success is said to be a neurotic concern- so my good author, do you perhaps mean what is a life worth living and more than just getting by?

How do we compare a failed life to that which is successful? How in our lonely experience can we truly know we find success in some collective of our species-in which case would not the trophies and recognition for ill or good be of value from others?

[asocialnorm]

Dragslave,

If I am not mistaken you are implying what was once stated in the movie Seven Years in Tibet: "This is another great difference between our civilization and yours. You admire the man who pushes his way to the top in any walk of life, while we admire the man who abandons his ego."

In another words, success in our society (I am generalizing here) is measured by the height of the mountain we climb (e.g. buying a big house, a big job, a grand education, etc.).

As for myself I will consider myself to be a successful man if I can let go of my ego while still living in a society that prides itself in walking over those who are humble.

[newyear]

dragslaye, a successful life is realising your dreams or ambitions, and knowing that once realised you have more and better ones to realise. It is something personal. Your idea of a collective nursery seems rather strange.

You may not wish for money, houses, etcetera, but some do, and get what they want. Others want to be nobel prize winners, and get what they want. Each of us have to decide what we want and acheive it. Obama wanted to be president of the US, and he made it against the odds. This shows you that we do realise our dreams, sooner or later. You will realise yours, too.

[asocialnorm]

Obama wanted to be president of the US, and he made it against the odds. This shows you that we do realise our dreams, sooner or later. You will realise yours, too.

Newyear, I respect your thoughts as they are valid. All except the Obama comment because the odds were always with him not against him.

[linda]

Success is what you want it to be. For one it could be financial. For another, it is loving and having a good relationship( and a good relationship is individually different for everyone. ) It could be a sinister action or behavior in a deranged mind. So successful doesn't have to be good or bad. Success is what you feel you have accomplished. That is one topic in itself. Now if you want to talk about being happy in your life, that is a different topic. But again, strangely enough, happiness can also be applied to the above comment. I would like to think that happiness and success would be good. That, in my difinition would be "Normal" and "right" But can we survive without having the opposite? That is the big question.
Linda

[Celestia]

Trust that which gives you meaning and accept it as your guide. --Jung

[builderofhappines]

How can we humans with only ourselves judge what is succsesful and what is not, or what is right or not. Our life can never be decided, because the poor man may say his life was sucssesful, but the rich man would say it wasn't and prove it, and the rich man might say his was, but his life may have missed some of the poor mans good expieriances. We can never decide

[philip8]

A successful life is one that is inspired by love and is guided by truth.

[newyear]

Newyear, I respect your thoughts as they are valid. All except the Obama comment because the odds were always with him not against him.

IThis has nothing to do with the odds when the dream is being realised but, and this is the thing, when the dream is thought of for the first time.

Celestia, I think the topic was success, not meaning. Many tiimes they may coincide, but it idoesn´t have to be a rule.

Happiness, being rich or poor has nothing to do with success. Marie and Pierre Curie were working in conditions that no poor or rich person would even consider.

[Celestia]

Trust that which gives you meaning and accept it as your guide. --Jung

Celestia, I think the topic was success, not meaning. Many tiimes they may coincide, but it idoesn´t have to be a rule.

You think, newyear? What sparks an individual to be successful in some way and create a personal path through life? What is at the root of each person's unique drive to achieve this rather than that? Why might my definition of "success" be different than yours, a given group's, or society's, for example? Just food for thought.

Celestia

[asocialnorm]

A successful life is one that is inspired by love and is guided by truth.

Wonderful. Didn't Bertrand Russell say something like this?

[newyear]

Trust that which gives you meaning and accept it as your guide. --Jung

There is a difference between meaning and success. I'll give you two examples: One. Mother Teresa of Calcutta was successful at treating the lepers of Calcutta, however, her meaning was following the catholic religion. She may have chosen another field in which to be successful, but not her meaning. Two. Thomas Edison was a successful inventor, with more that a thousand patents. Do you really think that his 'meaning' in life was inventing? Or, could it be looking for public acknowledgement, money, a divine desire to help his fellow human beings?

You think, newyear? What sparks an individual to be successful in some way and create a personal path through life? What is at the root of each person's unique drive to achieve this rather than that? Why might my definition of "success" be different than yours, a given group's, or society's, for example? Just food for thought.

You can see that meaning may be a continuous idea in which success springs. Success is multiple, whereas meaning is usually a single idea, or drive/will.

[dragslaye]

Allow me to thank everyone for sharing your thoughs on this topic.

PeSla:

Before even thinking what is to fail on life one most be aware that just by be here as species we have being very successful event when the odds are stack against us. Then we have to think in cases what is the worst thing that can happen to a person, and it comes to me that the only way for a person to fail into life is by being submerge on complete loneliness. By this I mean that you need to become the kind of person that non absolutely none will care about, the kind of person that if you would die none would share a single tear for you
PeSla allow me to ask you why do we collect trophies, why went we go to vacation we take pictures, why do we keep our old love letters?
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asocialnorm:
I haven't had the chance to watch Seven Years in Tibet. But I am in the process of downloading the movie, hopefully by tomorrow I will have the chance to watch it

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newyear
Just as I mentioned in my introduction, I was merely giving my own definition of a successful live in order to allow other to give their own definitions, this way I could reach a further understanding of what is important to different individuals.
By the way the odds were at favor of Obama in the other hand Bush won't against all odds( now that is something that I still don't understand). A least you are referring that he won regardless of being black at which it would be very racist though, after all we should value our peers by what they are able to do, no by what they look like

In the other hand I myself , I am an individual who lacks of dream or ambition, would that make then a failure on life?

inally in order to define your own definition of a successful life you need to understand what is you particular meaning of life

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Linda
You can have a very successful career yet you might feel that you life in empty, wouldn't this make you feel that you are failing on life?
isn't the amount of happiness directly linking of how much you like your life and as consecutive wouldn't this make you feel that you are succeeding on your life?
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builderofhappines
Truly a successful life is relative to the individual why iI am asking is what you builderofhappines consider a successful life
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[builderofhappines]

I think that a successful life is one where you can do what you want and are not forced to do what others want of you.

[PeSla]

By this I mean that you need to become the kind of person that non absolutely none will care about, ..PeSla allow me to ask you why do we collect trophies, why went we go to vacation we take pictures, why do we keep our old love letters?

dragslaye, I get the impression this is not really a question but I will answer any way. I suppose this is like A Christmas Carrol or A Wonderful Life where we have to deal with the ghosts of xmas past, present, and future. Humbug! What does it matter, from one philosopher's view, that any such state of death while alive can be said to exist at some other time, or any such sleep able to care about the opinion and emotions of other or even oneself? Is the purpose of this question perhaps to bond people into a more noble and peaceful society and not something otherworldly? Maybe once a year we raise the issues of giving for the general good and curse the poverty and greed, (or whatever were the children of one of the ghosts)- collective and false guilt perhaps that ignores the rest of the year and the majority of the individuals that make up that society.

But love letters, that hits home also on the disparate hoarding of all and any of our moments of life or time that we have some sort of memory or history that in this sense at least: We can take it with us as each moment vanishes. Or in our dedication to others we bring forth some repeal or promised land but cannot enter into it ourselves- that is we are bound to consider the future generations, and make a difference if we chose to- but we do not have to.

Loneliness is a certain alienation from sense and self and purposes. But Solitude can be home and not a prison of our circumstance and any form of slavery. We take pictures to ground things but this is also a picture of what is no longer there in memory at any time- it is a token but one that never reaches the ideal of belonging or being a part of others, a stance of consciousness to know at least another as you so in yourself isolate you sense of knowing oneself, at home with oneself- what of any such record is the purpose then- records like arbitrary rules and law merely ease the edge of the mental and physical violence, of revolution, of public outcry without weapons such that the species collectively compromise and are betrayed as if a gnat against an elephant or empire.

The issue is deeper than this, and the issue does seem to collective evolve and can be fate or chance of interconnections. That there is some integration of time as we go thru the melody to see a little more than the lower animals is the core realization that we cannot love another again if we kill love or the time of the lover of before- if we truly loved, if the break up did not effectively kills us or awakening us to some other love, the second time around. We the masters of cliche fall for such promises and roses as always because we are young and the dice are caste fresh again- or we lose the need to dream too soon before our vanishing or being forgotten as if a rehearsal for that sort of death for which we in this life no longer can care, an object then in the nothingness absolute and made of nothingness. Even what is selfish in our pretenses of outrages that no one cares save maybe in hypocritical lip service- to give for example a social worker whose advice for B who wants some purpose to go to the fundie church of which he is a member- that is to bind B into the prison he finds himself in and should not give advice any more than he who in the need to belong asks for it from one who needs is so much more- for he does not feel the present memory and empathy with others and worse in his whole life does not even realize that his lot was one of isolation, self involvement, loneliness to which the message is lost that Ebenezer did not so love himself as he would need to do to love another.

We make trophies also of our wardrobe and idols to which we bond to as our leaders even when we should know his feet of clay does not learn in the present day from the past of forgiving those who have betrayed and will betray the people. If, in our imperfections and abandonment and losses of what truly counts to make this world a better place you want to know yourself- sooner or later in this disoriented but persisting center of your soul you will find the haunting ghosts in the middle of the night and shed a tear, a living tear, for the hope and promise you once were- that you so can cry for another. And when, beyond the courage it takes to do so, and beyond the forgiveness itself- you may find that to which your own heart is a trophy to endure whatever real or imagined binds you- you will find that it does not matter. But if we forgive and weep with hope, heroic against the deep tragic inevitable fall of Love, then we will find our transcendent center at home in the world- and then so understand in the joy of life and its success no matter how dark and shallow, that we can then know how to shed a tear for others- even those who may have been should the world have been in this world a much better place.

There is some great point missing in all this commentary, some key, some reason to exist other than the shear stubbornness or curiosity- some need to which we at any age in the flesh and time of that age or not- all share universally and recognize in the need to allow the privacy of our wounds to which no comfort can be had or the theater of tears shed in a great and seemingly historical moment of change and happiness that may take this time against the germs of evil for this is in our hearts too- and like with the path to enlightenment or death- this too is where wisdom has to stand alone. Can one really take a vacation from his fellows and himself?

But I am not in the best frame of mind, of hopes, of purposes, and understanding- of the new- homeless but not in danger of some prison- and as I walk with but the herd to hide within or the wide sea of open space I can only limit by circumnavigating the whole world or my imagination, that space still wide enough for frontiers where one may choose to live off the grid- I still am not alone as I am weeping not as much for my sins, but the burdens of others- I used to be stronger to weep before the fact of our involvement for others and the that it makes a difference. Not my failure, not my blindness, but a deep and ongoing failure of us nevertheless.

Thus it is that our instinct, intellect, intuition or whatever churns the higher tides of thought and dreams remains in the end connected to at least the confession in faith or false hopes that good days for us all, surely they shall come. I alone human, have seen what evil in this world smiles at my stupidity of delusion- that I have done the best I can for myself and fellow man. I have known love and we are the only record as firm as it is- yet that record is the most enduring of all the grounds we have- and it defines the human spirit and is a measure of its success.

[philip8]

philip8 wrote:
A successful life is one that is inspired by love and is guided by truth.


Wonderful. Didn't Bertrand Russell say something like this?

Correct.

I paraphased Lord Russell in his chapter "Ethics" from his book Philosophy (1927). The actual quote is: "The good life is one inspired by love and guided by knowledge."

This is more than a Chinese cookie aphorism for Russell. He deduces the principle: Act so as to produce hamonius rather than discordant desires. Given that, Russell says that "it is clear that, if harmonious desires are what we should seek, love is better than hate, since, when two people love each other, both can be satisfied, whereas when they hate each other one at most can achieve the object of his desire. It is obvious also that desire for knowledge is to be encouraged, since the knowledge that a man acuires is not obtained by taking it away from some one else; but a desire for (say) large landed estates can only be satisified in a small minority. Desire for power over other people is a potent source of conflict, and is therefore to be discouraged; a respect for the liberty of others is one of the things that ought to be developed by the right kind of education. The impulse towards personal achievement ought to go into such things as artistic creation or scientific discovery or the promotion of useful intitutions-- in a word, into activities that are creative thather than possessive. Knowledge, which may do positive harm where men's desires coflict (for example, by showing how to make war more deadly), will have only good results where men's desires harmonize, since it tends to show how their comon desires are to be realized.

The conclusion may be summed up in a single phrase: The good life is one inspired by love and guided by knowledge."

However, the irony is that Russell's own personal life was a nine-decade long stew of discordant desires and emotions, resulting in multiple marriages and mistresses and madness and suicides of his granddaughters and son. He, like so many philosophers, loved humanity but hated people.

I cannot say that Bertrand Russell lived a good life.

[newyear]

In the other hand I myself , I am an individual who lacks of dream or ambition, would that make then a failure on life?

Perhaps consciously you think you don´t have a dream or an ambition but somewhere lurking in your mind it is there hiding from you. Your ambition may be your style of life, your work, your hobbies. Think about how you would like your life to be better, or if you can make it better for others. Just giving us your thoughts here on the forum may be the fulfillment of a long ago dream.

[dragslaye]

Pesla:

Actually i was trying to bring a chain of though by asking this questions, but clearly I fail =(. What I was trying to demonstrate is the importance of the people around us in contrast of the importance of saying pictures, awards etc.
By the way de main difference between loneliness and solitude is that no person chooses to be lonely but there are those who chose to live in solitude
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newyear
when it comes to work and hobbies is mostly i do does things out of need, for example i became an architect because i need some form of income, due to the lack of motivation i took upon a career that by just doing something that i like i still would become successful. About hidden dreams yes do posees a desire that i would like to fufill no matter what but it is too troublesome and i am tooo danm lazy to actually put any form of mechanism to work in order to fulfill my desire

[newyear]

newyear
when it comes to work and hobbies is mostly i do does things out of need, for example i became an architect because i need some form of income, due to the lack of motivation i took upon a career that by just doing something that i like i still would become successful. About hidden dreams yes do posees a desire that i would like to fufill no matter what but it is too troublesome and i am tooo danm lazy to actually put any form of mechanism to work in order to fulfill my desire

dragslaye, I guarantee that your dream will come true one day. It may take a very long time, and you will have probably forgotten that you ever dreamed such a thing. But, remember this post.

In most cases lazyness is psychological, not physical. That means you can do something about it if you want to. Perhaps, your idea of being lazy is not the same as others. An Eskimo may think you are not lazy at all.

[dragslaye]

newyear:
Even tho is ironic that i a an Architect(fine junior architect) and i make my living by creating, my dream for some reason that I still trying to understand is to destroy, to devour, to burn everything including myself down to ashes. Of course this would require a considerable amount of effort that to be honest i am way to lazy to actually put

[newyear]

dragslaye, burning to ashes is interesting. Not very ecological, but interesting still.

I suggest you focus your burning desire by creating works of art. You could paint, write about, or even sculpture works that you visualise. This will give you an opportunity to express how you feel, and will probably be of use to you. And, you never know, others will also enjoy what you produce.

[Sarge_Maximus2]

dragslaye, a successful life is realising your dreams or ambitions, and knowing that once realised you have more and better ones to realise. It is something personal. Your idea of a collective nursery seems rather strange.

You may not wish for money, houses, etcetera, but some do, and get what they want. Others want to be nobel prize winners, and get what they want. Each of us have to decide what we want and acheive it. Obama wanted to be president of the US, and he made it against the odds. This shows you that we do realise our dreams, sooner or later. You will realise yours, too.

Vicious propaganda. Lol. How many honest middle-class african american "joes" out there wanted to become president but had other commitments? This idea that you can pursue your dreams and they will come into being, is quite the load. I do not say that it is not possible, just that it is not possible for everyone.

As for your above comments, you prove another aspect of my point, which is that sometimes, people do not want other people to realise thier dreams, because it might hinder thiers. Humanity is selfish.

[brad_ut]

I like to think of life as unmeasurable.

There is no difference between winning the Super Bowl and dying from hunger as a homeless person. It is simply a chain of events that occur when a person meets the environment.

This may seem a little fatalistic. However, imagine for a moment the freedom this gives you.

You are no longer chained to desires put in place by the media, family, and social groups.

You may now pursue whatever activities you see fit without having to score them with a "successful" yardstick.

Thoughts?

[Paul Anthony]

Success is defined by the individual, but I'm inclined to agree with Denis Waitley:

"A life lived with integrity - even if it lacks the trappings of fame and fortune - is a shining star in whose light others may follow in the years to come".

[newyear]

Success is defined by the individual, but I'm inclined to agree with Denis Waitley:

"A life lived with integrity - even if it lacks the trappings of fame and fortune - is a shining star in whose light others may follow in the years to come".

Paul, this must be a fundamental idea. Success is far from fame and fortune. What greater success can there be than realising one´s desires?

Sarge, Obama has proven my point. Try not to let negative thinking dominate your positive side.

As for your last remark, Humanity is selfish, well we are all egoistic to degrees, but taking into account Paul´s quote, one can realise their desire with integrity.

[Sarge_Maximus2]

Sarge, Obama has proven my point. Try not to let negative thinking dominate your positive side.

As for your last remark, Humanity is selfish, well we are all egoistic to degrees, but taking into account Paul´s quote, one can realise their desire with integrity.

In one case it worked, I wouldn't say that it proved your point.

[DlsMatrix]

To have an a successful life first we must learn from our own failures. Cuz through our own failures is when we become successful in our own lives. Cuz most famous historical people is known from this and that's a fact.

[Sarge_Maximus2]

To have an a successful life first we must learn from our own failures. Cuz through our own failures is when we become successful in our own lives. Cuz most famous historical people is known from this and that's a fact.

There are alot of generalizations in those sentances. Got any specifics? Well I've got one that Disproves your point, a very famous man indeed: Hitler.

[DlsMatrix]

To have an a successful life first we must learn from our own failures. Cuz through our own failures is when we become successful in our own lives. Cuz most famous historical people is known from this and that's a fact.

There are alot of generalizations in those sentances. Got any specifics?.

Mainly I was talk-ing about inventors, companies and great thinkers all over the world.